Use your heart and not your eyes…

Guarding ones heart is one of the most important responsibilities a person has in one’s life. But what do you do if you were never taught how? What does it truly mean to guard your heart? Fortunately for you, I learned the hard way so I can speak on it from my point of view and hopefully you can grab some insight from what life and especially Holy Spirit taught me.

So, what does it mean to guard your heart? I’ll get into what it means to guard your heart in a few, but first let me set the foundation on how I was able to define it. When I was in my early 20s, I would hear people say guard your heart and I thought it meant to put a wall up, don’t fall in love to easily or to not let men play with my love. I thought it had everything to do with romantic relationships. It never crossed my mind that it had to do with ALL relationships, friendships, work relationships, community relationships and family relationships. As someone who grew up in an abusive household, I became hypersensitive to anticipate my parents needs; Which as a result it molded me into a people pleaser in my early adulthood. I valued everyone else’s opinion over my own cause I was indirectly taught as a child that my voice was not important. I didn’t learn how to express my own opinion, so often times I would agree with what others would say in fear of rejection. With that being said, I would also overshare to gain connection with people because subconsciously I felt inadequate. I bring all this up to say that I didn’t have the foundational skills to begin guarding my heart. Guarding your heart is having healthy boundaries in place to filter out what you receive in your inner most being which ultimately molds who you are. Proverbs 4:23 says “Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Your heart is the source of where your thoughts, actions and behaviors are influenced and formed. In my case, I didn’t have a functioning heart filter; I would allow negative thoughts about myself and others in, which caused me to become bitter. I also would share things to people who didn’t have my best interest at heart and would conspire against my moment of vulnerability or influence me to become more bitter and/or partake in malicious conversations about others. This is only a few examples of how not guarding my heart led me to produce fruit of the flesh.

You may be asking, what’s fruit of the flesh Nohemi? Well I have an answer for you my friend. Fruit of the flesh is the result of when we operate in our sinful selves. In Galatians 5:19-21, it lists out what the fruit of the flesh are which is sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, rage, selfish ambition, envy and drunkenness/gluttony. All of these come from a result of not properly guarding your heart. I implore you to intentionally seek wisdom from our Father in heaven to inherit guidance from the holy spirit. Learning to guard your heart with the holy spirit guiding you, you’ll inevitably produce fruits of the spirit mentioned in Galatians 5:22-23, which is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.

But Nohemi, you never mentioned how I can seek wisdom from our Heavenly Father. Well my friend, to answer you on that, my advice would be to read your bible and ask God to open your eyes and ears to understand who He is while you read the text. Everyone’s journey is different with gaining insight from our Heavenly Father because it deals with the relationship we build with Him. The way I pray and talk to God might not fit for you and vise versa.

But back to the topic at hand, Guarding your Heart involves a developed sense of discernment as well. There’s a part in the bible that comes to mind when I meditate on what it means to discern wisely in regards to guarding my heart and it is in Matthew 7:6 “Do not give what is holy to the dogs: nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.” What I get from this metaphor that Jesus used is we shouldn’t share what is important and valuable to those who will ridicule and judge and reject what we have to say. Granted, Jesus used this metaphor in response to wanting to teach the people the difference between being judgmental and having discernment, but I believe it can apply to having discernment with guarding your heart. Simply put, Don’t tell your business to those who don’t steward their own lives in a way you would want to live. Be wise with who you grant access to your innermost self. A way you can discern who is a trustworthy person is by looking at the fruit they produce in their own life. Do they produce fruit of the spirit or fruit of the flesh? Once you figure out what kind of fruit they produce, you’ll be able to move accordingly in how you interact with them. But remember, you produce fruit of the spirit too, so always handle everyone with Love. Also before I go, I’ll add this, if you have the desperate urge to share something , share it with our Heavenly Father first. He will always guide you and give insight no human can give with their own understanding and he’ll let you know who is safe to share with.

I hope you were able to grab some meaningful advice from this and I hope to see you again soon… xoxo